Blatently Stolen. "Vices"

I took this from EmilyElizabeth's blog (if you're a random person checking in, then you should check her out, if you aren't, well, you should do it anyway.)

My top vices: Things I could not live without (in no particular order)

1 (-3). My iPhone (and various iPods)

I love my iPhone.  I knew how addicted I would be to have a phone with internet (I have a serious problem with checking things every 5 seconds), but I seriously don't know what to do with myself when I don't have it on me.  Last week I knew I was low on battery when I went to work.  It died, naturally, but then it wasn't showing that it was connected to any kind of charging source.  I freaked out.  I ended up taking it to the Apple store to have them fix it for me, and it turns out I am iPhone stupid because I didn't know to push the right buttons.  It's fine, which is great, but for the 12 hours that I had to resort to my old phone I was freaking out miserable.  It was like I'd cut off my own arm or something, I just did not know how to function.  Pathetic? Yes.  But I accept this.

I love my little nano.  It is probably the only thing that gets me through the gym.  I made up a bunch of playlists that are upbeat and great for running out frustration, and it's small enough that it's not a hassle to move back and forth from different machines.  Plus it's green, how can you not love it?

 I will admit, my classic does not get nearly enough love these days (between the iPhone and the nano, most basic functions are taken care of. Poor baby!) It is, however, fantastic for plane rides and long car drives down to Matt.  It has every single song I own on it, and there is still room to spare.  I love it so much.  It does mean that playlists are an absolute must because sometimes I'm just not in the mood for some of the things that pop up.

4. My car

Look at it.  Love it. My car is a 2003 gold Pontiac Aztek which I adore.  It holds more things than I can even think of, I managed to get the entirity of my freshman dorm into this car (including microwave and minifridge).  It is a tank.  I personally think it looks like a mountain lion, and his name is Xander.  This car has been up to Syracuse, down to Maryland, out to Gettysburg, it's hit a divider on the highway, it's been hit by a bird.  I put 100 miles a day on it over the summer, and the only things wrong with it are the lights that show what gear you're in don't light up anymore and the cruise control (which I never ever use anyway) doesn't work.  70,000 miles and counting...

5. My Keurig (and their Chai Latte)

I love my Keurig.  I especially love the Chai Latte, because it is delicious and only 70 calories for the K-cup.  But mostly because it is delicious :)  I normally don't like a lot of the coffee they offer, but they make some fabulous teas and this little number.  Nothing better than instant tea gratification!

6.  My boyfriend :)

 

 This is my absolute favorite picture of the two of us together (photo taken by Bleavitt). I think he just looks adorable.  If you've read any of my past posts, you know what Matthew means to me, if not, it's an awful lot.  He makes me happy, and while it isn't a perfect relationship (I don't think they exist, all relationships require work) it's really, really good.  We fight, but I think we have fun more than we fight.  We make each other happy, and that's all that matters, right?

7. Conservation, or at least the hope that I will get to do it one day.

I love what I do.  I love being involved in art, I love being involved in prolonging the life of an object.  I like giving it a history, researching where it's been, who painted it, why they might have painted it this way, researching the colors used, the materials, all of the chemical analysis.  There is such a sense of satisfaction at the end of a project, no matter how many ups and downs, near disasters or mistakes there may have been during the treatment, no matter how many frustrations there have been during the analysis and research, when you can see the final result.  You can look at where you started and where you are now, and know how much you have helped that object.  It's like healing people, but they're objects.  It's something that just captures my interest, and I love it.  It has... gotten in the way at times, my passion is something that I will pursue for forever, and because of it's specific nature I can't go live wherever I want.  I need a city with museums, or an area with artists who need private conservators.  Those can't exactly be found just anywhere.  But after having that satisfaction, after finding something that I care about that makes me happy in my work life, I can't just give that up at the drop of a hat.  I've done other jobs, and nothing thusfar has made me anywhere close to as happy as this does.

Alrighty, I guess that's it.  Those are some of the things I just could not do without :)

Vagabond

I came to a realization yesterday when I drove back from Matt's. I don't really have a "home" home anymore, and it feels sort of weird to think about it.

The house where all of my stuff is, all of my clothes and my bed, and where I grew up doesn't have the same home feel. This is part the fact that Mom moved out, but also partly because this place ceased being the center of my world when I graduated high school. My friends aren't here anymore, I pretty much use the house as a place to crash after work. Yes, it's familiar, there are thousands of memories scampering through every corner of the building, but it's not the same. I feel sort of badly that this doesn't feel like home, especially since I feel like my dad is really hoping that I'll stay for longer. It's just not the right place for me to be.

My Mom's is a perfectly fine place to visit, but it's not really home either. It's like fake revisiting my college roomie days, where I have my own room to a certain extent, and it's nice to see my mom and to hang out and eat dinner. But that apartment never has been and most likely never will be "home" to me. I don't leave any stuff there, the room I stay in is a technical guest room but I think I visit and stay over more frequently than anyone else. The other non-home feature is that I don't have a key, I have to be let in every time.

Matt's, in all honesty, is more like a home than anywhere else has been recently. We go out, we see his (our?) friends, we get to be with each other. I have a key now, which is nice, especially if I'm coming down when either he or his mom isn't home, or if either of them are out at work I can leave and feel safe in knowing the house is locked. The main problem is that it isn't our house.  He still lives with his mom (no complaints, it saves money, she lets us more or less do whatever we want, and I like her a lot), but we can't just run around the house however we want, and there's always that sort of "oh is this ok?" aspect on my part.  I keep a bunch of stuff down there now, partially because I've forgotten it and partially because it's just easier to not have to pack and repack every time I head down.  I think what makes it the most like home is because Matt is there, and nothing feels quite right when he's not around.  I don't quite know how to describe it, but everything feels more like home when he's there, even if it's nowhere at all.  I'd trade a good day up here on my own for a crappy day down there with him just because it would be with him.  My good and exciting days up here aren't as good or exciting as they could be because I can't come back home and tell him all about them in person and snuggle up and talk.  It's little things like that that make a place home, and I don't have those here.

It was just something on my mind.

Just a couple thoughts

I haven't updated in a while, I thought it was about time to post something!

1.  Dad just came in to say goodnight.  He smelled like Listerine and was wearing his retainers.  He's kind of adorable sometimes.  Also, maybe because I'm wearing running shoes and he was barefoot, but I feel like he's getting shorter, or I'm getting taller.  I'm hoping for the former, I couldn't stand to be taller than I am. 

2.  I have put on every friggin' pound I lost before London in November.  DAMNIT.  Granted, I haven't been getting to the gym or eating particularly healthy, so it's to be expected, but I swear from the lightest I was Freshman year to now I've put on 45 pounds.  I'd be happy dropping about 30 of those to start, about 35-40 to be really really happy.  I know I'm still pretty, and I do like having curves, but when I see people from high school or those super skinny in shape girls at the gym (not the emaciated ones, those make me sad) I want to just stop eating and run on a treadmill until there's nothing left on my body but muscle.  I hate feeling jiggly, I hate not fitting into clothes, I hate being the size I am.  My main problem is that I don't have a "oh I shouldn't eat that, I'm trying to be healthy" attitude, I have a "Hell yeah I'll have two slices of cake and double helpings because it's TASTY!" attitude.  My attitude does not help lose weight.  That and I'm still not 100% honest with myself about the fact that my metabolism is so not what it used to be.

3.  I've gotten into the habit of checking everything all the time.  Forums for comics, my emails, random things on the internet.  It's like I can't entertain myself unless I'm doing something on my phone.  Ridiculous.  I need to read a book.

4.  I've been studying for the GREs and they scare the crap out of me.  I'm super nervous about them because I basically get one shot, at least for free.  Dad is paying for the first test, if I feel like I should retake it, it's $160 on me.  Ouch.  I guess that's why I'm trying to prep ahead of time as much as possible.  3 months and counting.

5.  I really wish I'd been able to drive down to see Matt tonight instead of waiting to tomorrow.  I've been up since 5:45, which is probably not great for driving, as well as the fact that the roads were kind of iffy this morning.  I figure I'll shoot to be there around the time he gets home from work.  Hopefully I'll be able to get into his driveway.

6.  I miss snuggling.

7.  I never seem to get to the point where EVERYTHING is put away.  I get about 90% of the way there, and then there's laundry that's up drying that isn't put away, or there are things on my desk that should really be sorted.  Last night I slept with DVDs on half of my bed because I just couldn't be bothered to put them where they belong before I fell asleep.  I don't know why I am this way.  I really love organization, but I tend to tackle too much at once.

Anyway, that's about it.  We got crazy amounts of snow over the past week, I think we had a total of about 40 inches at my house.  We have a 5 or 6 foot tall pile next to my driveway just from clearing the front path and part of the drive.  There are two more giant piles at the bottom of the driveway, you kind of have to pray no one is coming when you go to leave. Hope you all are having a great week!

Movin' On Up

Alright, so I'm not technically moving anywhere at the moment, but I do have some fun developements at least.

Today I signed up to take the GREs and downloaded a study program from the company that sponsors it. I also got a couple books and looked up deadlines for grad schools.  It feels like I'm at least getting started on the rest of my life, which I think is a good thing.  I'm also looking at additional part-time work to help me save up a little money to get out of the house.

Also, I talked to one of my roommates from last year and she and her boyfriend are planning on renting a house come June and will have extra room for me to move in (should I get the job at Winterthur.  If there even is a job to be had.)  Rent would be ridiculously cheap, and I'd be living with people I like again!

All in all it's kind of exciting.  All I have to do is get through the next couple of months.