Hey there long time...

Hey everybody, or whoever you are that read this.

Most likely no one. But I do enjoy addressing someone. It makes it feel more personal.

Even though the internet is about as impersonal as it gets.


ANYWAY, speaking of the internet, I came to a realization the other day and actually had a really intelligent conversation with my mother. She was commenting on how there seems to be a wave pattern to marriage age, with people marrying very young in my grandmother's era, which then got progressively older before marrying, then finally is doing a giant backswing with my generation. She seemed surprised because there are so many more things to do, so many people have more dreams and want to accomplish more and apparently see marriage as something that will get in the way of what they want or them achieving it as soon as possible.

She wanted to know why.

I sat, and I thought about it. I came to two conclusions. One being that my generation was brought up in an era where everything is becoming less and less personal. We have little face to face contact, we chat on instant messenger in the same room instead of having an honest conversation, we text people instead of calling them, we send emails instead of writing snail mail. There is almost no personality to text, straight text on a screen. People can lie boldfaced to you and you would never suspect a thing because you can't read them like you would in real life. When we find people who we connect with not just in this electronic setting but also in the real world, we crave intimacy and closeness, we are lacking in real, normal, face to face relationships. So we find it, we latch onto it, and marry it, and pretend like it's perfectly fine to do so.

My second conclusion also deals with the Age of Technology. People are used to instantaneous responses now. Before, it was common to wait a day or two to hear from someone, a phone call once a week would suffice, letters that would take a few days to get there were normal. Everything for my generation is instant. Messaging, texting, everything, there is absolutely no reason that we can't be in touch all the time with everyone. Everything has been sped up, and we've become a generation of impatient people who can't fathom waiting a month for anything, much less until we're 26-27 if we're convinced we're in love at 18. A month into a relationship? Things are going well? Destined to be married by 6 months. You've been dating for a year? You aren't engaged yet?!?! What's wrong with you?

While I personally think that I fall partially into the first group and can understand the second group, I think we all need to up our rational sides. At the ripe young age of 21, I have absolutely no financial stability, no steady job, am looking to go back to school and am unsure as to if I'll get in. There are a lot of instabilities and variables in my own personal life that I think would make settling down and getting married difficult at this time. That doesn't mean that a few years down the road I wouldn't be all up for it. Hell, I'm up for it now, I just don't think it would go as smoothly as if we waited and saved. I fall more into the group that my mother was talking about. The group that has so much that they want to do and so little time to do it in. I have dreams and goals, and there is a definite path that I have to take to get there, and I don't know what marriage would do to throw me off it. It's sort of a selfish reason, but I would rather wait and be stable rather than throw myself in and have us flounder about because we didn't plan. I would hate to resent someone for stopping me from getting what I want out of life.

And that little jumbled piece of mess is what I came up with.

Later all : )